I Hate This Bible Verse!

In Proverbs 27:23, Solomon says: "Be diligent to know the state of your flocks, and attend to your herds."
Can I just say that I really hate this verse...

For the last few years I have tried to read through Proverbs at the rate of one per day.  I dread the 27th of every month, because I know that means I am on the 27th Proverb and it means that I am going to have to read this verse again.  You may think I'm just being silly, but if I take this verse seriously - it is requiring regular self-evaluation.  I don't like self-evaluation and as the shepherd of my family I really don't like to evaluate how I am doing as a husband and a father.  I do not like to take account for my flocks and herds.

Don't get me wrong...I love my wife and I love my kids and I will go out of my way to provide for them beyond measure.  My problem stems from the possibility that my flocks are not doing as well as I think they are doing.

I know it's just a form of fear...fear of being disappointed with myself, fear of failure, fear of being a poor shepherd.  Because just when I think everything is okay and I have a handle on my flocks, it is time to stop again and inspect the herds.  I don't want to find out that they are unhealthy, that they've been grazing in the wrong pasture, or that my poor gatekeeping has allowed wolves to sneak in while I was "on watch."

I want to be a good shepherd.  I want to be a caring shepherd, one that protects his flock, one that leads his flock to green pastures and safe havens.  I want to be attentive to the needs of the herd and mindful of threats before they show up at the gate.  I want to use my rod and my staff regularly.  But, most importantly, when the Chief Shepherd returns, I want to give Him a good report and show Him that I have cared well for His flock that he gave me to protect.

Quietly making noise,