Haven't Heard That One Before...

Well, here we are...the final week of pregnancy...

In order to save you from asking...I thought I'd post the answers to the questions that I am asked daily regarding our newest mangobaby.  (Think of it this way...I see about thirty patients each day, so multiply these questions by 30 and you'll see why it becomes blogworthy for theMT). 

And i'm not trying to be sarcastic...just wanted to put these questions to rest...

So in no particular order, here are the answers to the questions I am asked constantly regarding my soon to be laboring wife...(I'm sure you can figure out the questions).

Answer #1:  We are having a boy.  Wes, this does makes seven.  Right, we have three boys, three girls, and now another boy...and, no we are not trying to repeat a pattern, keep a pattern, play tic tac baby or do anything other than be faithful to what the Lord continues to provide.

Answer #2: March 6th, according to the sonographer, but march 8th according to her hormonal calendar calculations.  I know that's too much information, but most people aren't happy when I say around the end of February or beginning of March...so there you have it.

Answer #3:  She normally goes early.  Everyone of them came early.  The latest was born ON his due date.  It was the third boy, so there is no rhyme or reason to it...and I don't need a theory on why this one will or will not be born on, before, or after his due date...remember...I'm a Calvinist...he'll get here when he gets here.

Answer #4: His name is Christian Andrew.  Uh huh, we realize his name will be the opposite of Fletcher Christian, who mutinied on the Bounty.  We are not big "mutiny" fans, so we didn't pick his name up there...  and, no also to the question about Pilgrim's Progress, sure it was a classic book, but I'm not using allegory in the naming of my kids.  For that matter, no we did not name him after Caroline's husband either.  We just liked the idea of the name Christian and his middle name also happens to be my name and I happen to be named after my maternal grandfather.

Answer #5 : She will have the baby when it's time to have the baby.

Answer #6 : She feels fine.  She is peeing every 10 minutes, eating tums like they are snack chips and is getting more and more sarcastic every time someone says, "Hey when you gonna have that thing?" (see #5 above).

Answer #7 : Right now?  She is at 3 cm and 70% effaced.  His head is low and in position for delivery.  So, yup...she's ready...

Then my favorites...because this is where the answers get really fun...

Answer #8 : Yup, we know how it happens and I could go into real explicit detail to prove to you that I know how it happens...but to keep it fun, realize that this is the reason we keep having them...wink wink...nudge nudge

Answer #9 : We'll have as many as the Lord provides.  So far he's given us seven.  At our ages, we fully expect a realistic number to be about ten...but we are open to as many as He is willing to give us.

Answer #10:  There are five players on a basketball team, nine on a baseball team, eleven on a  football team...no we are not "fielding" a team of any sorts...

I realize that most people do care...so don't get all fussy about this list...I don't need a bunch of comments saying that I'm way too critical.  I didn't write this for my friends and patients that are honestly wanting an update...it's for the same person that thinks they are being hysterically funny when they make a crack about a dentist having to take a class to understand people who talk when you have your hands in their mouth...it's just not that funny...although I will still giggle and act like it's the first time i've ever heard the joke...

Quietly making noise,
Fletch